Climbing Like a Crazy Man

A few weeks ago I shared with my friend Beth some of my ideas, my secret musings and hopes for the future. I suppose in my voice Beth detected some doubts, but also she sensed some vision flowing from the Divine. Beth challenged me and said, “What do you need, a burning bush?”
I have been interested in the burning bush for sometime now, mostly after discovering a painting from Albert Herbert that shows a burning bush at the birth of Christ. Also, I did a brief study of the work of Minnie Evans, and Seraphine Louis and found in the works of these spiritualist artists, burning or illuminated bushes. The plants in their paintings had a scary other worldliness quality about them. They were both considered “crazy.” Even Albert Herbert wasn’t taken seriously.
Recently I have been reading some devotional lessons comparing Mt. Sinai and Mt. Zion. Sinai is where the LAW was handed down, where Moses found the burning bush. Zion is where our MERCIFUL God sits on his throne.
My niece stumbled across some of her old writings, and in a journal she found what she recorded as she hiked toward the summit of Machu Picchu. In her blog she shared her find, the memory of her experience, and her long ago journal entry recording the sensation of her climb. In her reflection she discovered that she longed to feel that way again, “Feeling terrified and persevering at the summit; your summit, not necessarily the one on the map. It was all completely unknown. More than wanting it again, I want to know it when I feel it. . . honor it and document it.”
I haven’t been sharing that fact that I lost my job at Morenci. I don’t like talking about the poop, the hassles, the grief, anger, loan deferments, fear, unemployment, or the retirement issue. I’ve been quiet. This spring and summer I have been descending down Sinai.
Lately, I have been quiet and quietly moving up a mountain pass, thinking of the possibilities of a new summit, and feeling terrified. I responded to my niece’s entry saying, “I am on the side moving UPward feeling excited, doubtful about my own strength, wondering if where I end up will be less meaningful than what I hope for. I can hear and feel the thoughts of others; psychically reading their encouragement, doubts, and jealousy of me. I keep reminding myself to block out the voices and forget the results. It's the adventure of the journey and the trying that matters.
Am I on the right path? Do I need a burning bush? Which mountain am I climbing, Sinai or Zion? There is a passage in 1Chronicles that tells of David receiving some discipline. David could choose whose hand he would suffer under, God’s or David’s enemies. David chose God, because He is merciful. I don't need a burning bush to tell me what to do. I am at a point where I want to take my chances with God, with Zion, even if I look crazy doing so.

Glacier

The hydrangeas have faded, but a new flower have won my attention. These beautiful Glacier morning glories. I love the Heavenly Blue, but these have been so sweet and delicate. The plants have been robust and have given me many flowers. Flowers truly ARE comforting.

I apologize for the blurr I was in a hurry to take his picture before I bit his arm off. I was surprised to find a gingerbread man at Johann's in Boyne City in August. He was more molasses tasting than ginger. My recipe has more spice and I use mild molasses. But he was very tender to the tooth.

The lovely cupcakes were made by Wendy at Dr. Garza's office. She had bake sales on Fridays to raise money for relay for life. The pink swirl was soooo good. It was pink lemonade flavored. The violet hydrangea was red velvet cake, and the sunflower? I don't know. Never tasted it.

The Sun Sets in the East

On sunny evenings the light from the setting sun can be seen in my north/east living room. The light is reflected off the windows of the old school across the street.
It is a strange phenomenon that I'm sure isn't Feng Shui approved. But it gives me a thrill when it happens. On this day I took pictures of the school. It appears that the radiance of God is beaming from the windows, or that the sun is actually inside the building.

Forgive, but do not Forget

The Cats of Mirikitani is a fascinating documentary.
Trained artist Jimmy Mirikitani lost his family and American citizenship while placed in a California internment camp for Japanese Americans. The scars following the experience eventually left him homeless and living on the streets of NY. In spite of his circumstance he devoted his life's energy to creating art(cute cats) and artfully documenting his painful experience in the camp.

When he is offered help to improve his living status he is reluctant. Help can seem intrusive. But his persistent friend helps him obtain the fifty or more year old documentation (passed out in the 1950's) restoring his citizenship. He never received the papers and never knew the government's regret over asking him and others to renounce their citizenship.
His life for more than 60 years had been fueled by this injustice placed on him.

At first I felt saddened that his life had been consumed by this act of discrimination. I wondered what would his life had been like if he had received the papers. In reflection I think the intensity of what he remembered and the manner in which he expressed his story was needed. History was waiting for just the right moment, for the right people to hear and apply wisdom gained by acknowledging the tragedy of Jimmy's experience.

Jimmy's life was restored so that he got a home off the streets, but even more amazing is the love, forgiveness, and joy which now consumes his life.

Forgive, but do not forget
Do not forget to forgive

Seeker

"A seeker is a person who makes honest and sincere efforts on a daily basis to grow spiritually."

It has been a long while since my last entry. I have allowed myself to become consumed by many distractions.
My last entry was about seeing and giving full attention. Today I am thinking about seekers. I guess I accept the definition above. I think a lot about:
"life is a journey about becoming a better version of yourself"
"create conditions for success"
"there are no ideal conditions"

I recently read in Time magazine "Reading, in its quietness and sustained concentration, is the opposite of busyness." Lev Grossman, writing about author Jonathan Franzen made other insightful comments that struck a chord in me, "The place of (internal and external) stillness you have to go to ... to engage productively ..."

Reducing the external (and to a lesser degree, internal)distractions has been a challenge. For me the steps toward a "better version of self" requires "quietness and sustained concentration" to work at exploring/exposing my potential.

I feel a need to write a list.

Seeing

A few weeks back I met a really interesting lady who suggested I investigate the magazine Seeing the Everyday. I talk a lot about living life in "full attention," the words Seeing the Everyday just rephrases that idea. Some of the concepts suggested on the site are "finding the poetry in the prosaic." Meaning that there is beauty and wisdom found in the "ordinary."
While looking over the site I found the following words. The text is rather small so I can't credit the author, but lately, I have talked a lot about effort, spiritual wholeness, and about living life as a work in progress that will never be fully completed. The author in concise language summed it all up,
"Whatever wholeness we achieve requires enormous work, which is the effort of life; and that work is never complete."

William Isaacs in his book Dialogue and the Art of Thinking Together says "the act of respect invites us to see others as legitimate." Seeing = Respect Isaacs's also says the Zulu word Sawa translates as "I see you" which at it's essence means "I sustain you in the world." I was struk when I read the passage because I made the connection "I see you" to ICU.
When I respect and give full attention, to you or anything in life, I am making an intensive care unit in my heart.

Movie Reviews

I LOVE the Kung Fu Chefs. The acting and stunts are reminiscent of older kung fu films. The translations used for subtitles are awkward at times, but this adds to the humor and charm of the film. Themes are: loyalty, perfecting one's art (food prep is serious business in Asia), justice, and the sensuality of food. Four****

Red Cliff parts I & II are marvelous! Themes include: ambition, loyalty, honor, envy, wisdom, and justice. The interesting story references Sun Tzu's historic text The Art of War. ****

Military leaders and businessmen have read The Art of War to better understand and implement strategy. While physical logistics is a key element of the guide, concepts like wisdom, intuition, and morality are also essential elements for ensuring success in combat.

The Station Agent is a surprising movie. It was a little slow in parts, but its underlying message about acceptance, and social support will warm the heart of anyone who feels like an outsider.

The main female character in The Station Agent is clumsy and out of balance, like Rosalba in Bread and Tulips. I have had moments when I am "out of balance" and seem to drop everything. These movies remind me that it's not exactly me who is out of balance, but the world can be shaky or my perception skewed like I'm walking through a (not so) fun house.

Paris, Je T'aime is a wonderful collection of five minute short films about love in Paris. I marvel at any artist's ability to convey a poignant message in a short about of time, words, and imagery. I think a lot about "economy of language" and "less words, more meaning," so this DVD was very satisfying to me.

The Visitor is yet another good movie. It reminds us how music can make us whole, and bring us together.

And finally any of you who like "quirky" must see Paper Heart. LOVE IT! Is it a real documentary or a mockumentary? I'm not sure and it doesn't matter. A good dose of creative cuteness will be discovered.

Don't forget the popcorn (made in the pan with extra butter)!